Hello and Welcome
For those of us here today, I offer you my hand for the commonplace we share, for what we have been through and also what we have to look forward to. Maybe you are a parent, a close friend, or even the sufferer. Whoever you may be, let us all come together for the benefit of all our souls. We are all looking for some solace, understanding, and relief for overcoming anxiety and depression.
LOANING SOMEONE YOUR STRENGTH… INSTEAD OF REMINDING THEM OF THEIR WEAKNESSES.
I OFFER YOU THIS WORD… ‘KINDNESS’… AND ITS DEFINITION AS A STARTING POINT, AND ALSO AS THE BASE THAT WE MUST COME BACK TO, WHENEVER WE EXPERIENCE THOSE FEELINGS OF FRUSTRATION AND HELPLESSNESS, FOR THOSE TIMES WHEN WE FEEL LIKE NOTHING WE DO IS GOING TO CHANGE ANYTHING.
OUR KINDNESS, PRESENCE, UNDERSTANDING, AND COMPASSION WILL BE OUR GREATEST ALLIES FOR PEACE DURING THESE CHALLENGING TIMES.
It is the greatest of temptations for us who are close and know not what to do. To get so frustrated, to feel so helpless that we come to the point where not knowing what to do, we resort to that final place having exhausted every other option, we make the decision that we will shame them into change, resorting to reminding them of their weaknesses.
This is so natural, simply because we don’t have the knowledge or understanding of what is taking place within that someone we love beyond compare. As a parent, we have this innate need or desire to want to fix everything and fix it now. As we have, or will find out, this is not the answer…and the outcome for you can only be regret.
Having witnessed someone close suffer from anxiety has truly been a gut-wrenching experience for me. Depression coupled with the anxiety attacks and immobility had broken my heart. To feel so powerless to do anything but offer support and have patience through it all.
I have not been immune to depression and anxiety attacks myself, but on a somewhat smaller scale than most, or maybe it was just the fact I couldn’t lie down in the face of it. One thing for sure, that during my experience it was a time of extreme loneliness, darkness, and despair. I wanted to be alone and for everything to just go away.
Through my years of seeking truth, I have been able to overcome many of the negative feelings and emotions that I had in my younger years. My daily rituals of exercising, reading, meditation, and diet have become a way of life for me, these self disciplines have bought me freedom in all aspects of my life.
However, I was to recently experience this with the sufferer being my only child. My beautiful, pure and so innocent daughter. To understand on a deeper scale, our relationship had been loving but also very volatile, with us both not understanding anything about each other and having 2 completely different perceptions of each other.
You see for the past nine months I have lived with my daughter for the very first time and have experienced first hand all the traumas associated with watching a loved one suffer, it has come close to destroying us both. I dedicate this post in the hope that we can all be survivors and not statistics.
Definition of Anxiety
- A feeling of worry, nervousness or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.
- A nervous disorder characterised by a state of excessive uneasiness and apprehension, typically with compulsive behaviour or panic attacks.
- Desire to do something, typically accompanied by unease.
SYNONYMS FOR ANXIETY
To really grasp some of the emotions experienced let’s take a look at some synonyms.
There is no judgment here. The following ideas are simply thoughts from people who are respected and often revered in their knowledge of how the mind works. They are suggestions and are listed to support you, they are simply reminders of what you already know deep within your amazingly beautiful soul.
“The truth is that there is no actual stress or anxiety in the world; it’s your thoughts that create these false beliefs. You can’t package stress, touch it, or see it. There are only people engaged in stressful thinking.”
“People tend to dwell more on negative things than on good things. So the mind then becomes obsessed with negative things, with judgments, guilt, and anxiety produced by thoughts about the future and so on.”
“Fear, anger, misery, frustration, depression, and despair are all products of a mind that you have not taken charge of.”
Let’s look at some personal insights from people who have also experienced anxiety, stress, and depression. Here they tell how it feels to them as they describe their experience and explain what’s going on in their minds… in their own words.
“My anxiety is silent. You wouldn’t even notice a change on the outside but I’m honestly so stressed I can’t even manage simple tasks. People call me lazy when, in reality, I’m just overwhelmed.”
“I get nervous about everything. Sometimes I literally don’t know why I’m anxious. I just am and no-one seems to understand that.”
“How do you run away from things that are in your head?
“Silence is the most powerful scream.”
“Anxiety makes you sit there and overthink every single thing. At times it makes you think people in your life are leaving you. You begin to feel abandoned, and not worth anything because the most important people in your life don’t want you.”
“It’s sad, actually, because my anxiety keeps me from enjoying things as much as I should at this age.”
“Anxiety is terrible, you could be having an attack and no one would even know, because it’s an inward thing. It feels like you’re malfunctioning and you can’t process your own thoughts. You get a knot in your stomach and you can’t take a full breath, but outwardly you can literally just sit there and look completely normal, as long as no one tries to speak to you.”
“Social anxiety isn’t a choice. I wish people knew how badly I wish I could be like everybody else, and how hard it is to be affected by something that can bring me to my knees every single day.”
“When I say can’t take on even one more thing, I really need you to understand I really just can’t.”
“The thing about an anxiety disorder is that you know it is stupid. You know with all your heart that it wasn’t a big deal and that it should roll off of you. But that is where the disorder kicks in.
Suddenly the small things are very big and it keeps growing in your head, flooding your chest, and trying to escape from under your skin. You know with all of your heart that you’re being ridiculous and you hate every minute of it.”
“Even when things are wonderful. I’m always waiting for something horrible to happen.”
“I say “sorry” a lot, mostly because I feel everything is my fault.”
“I worry my depression and anxiety are always going to keep me from being the person I dreamed of becoming.”
“Anxiety is the most silently painful experience. It makes no sense and you sit alone and suffer for an unknown reason. You can’t explain it. You can’t stop it, It is horrible.”
“I’m terrified that even if I try my hardest, I still won’t be good enough.”
We can now begin to lift the dark veil of uncertainty…with a change in our perception of things we can move forward, one step… or one thought at a time, and go out once again into a world that loves and supports us in every way known. To take our first steps back out into the beauty that surrounds us in every glance… Let us rediscover the divine perfection that we truly are…along with the miracle of every breath we take.
“I am safe right now. This will fade away. I am not in danger. I am getting enough air. I am starting to relax. I feel calmer. I am going to be okay.”
“When thinking about life, remember this: No amount of guilt can solve the past, and no amount of anxiety can change the future.”
“You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.”
“You are strong for getting out of bed in the morning when it feels like hell. You are brave for doing things even though they scare you or make you anxious, and you are amazing for trying and holding on, no matter how hard life gets.”
“Be gentle with yourself you’re doing the best you can.”
“Nothing can bring you peace but yourself.”
“When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”
“Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action.”
“I will breathe. Worry will not control me. Stress will not break me.”
“Let whatever you do today be enough.”
“I will breathe. I will think of a solution. I will not let my worry control me. I will not let me stress break me. I will simply breathe. And it will be okay. Because I don’t quit.”
“Worry pretends to be necessary, but serves no useful purpose.”
“Worry is a down payment on a problem you may never have.”
“If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.”
“Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy.”
“Worrying is like walking around with an umbrella waiting for it to rain.”
“Understanding the difference between healthy striving and perfectionism is critical to laying down the shield and picking up your life. Research shows that perfectionism hampers success. In fact, it’s often the path to depression, anxiety, addiction, and life paralysis.”
“Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.”
“You’re not going to master the rest of your life in one day just relax. Master the day. Then just keep doing that every day.”
“Do not let your difficulties fill you with anxiety, after all, it is only in the darkest nights that stars shine more brightly.”
“Our anxiety does not come from thinking about the future, but from wanting to control it.”
“Slow breathing is like an anchor during an emotional storm: the anchor won’t make the storm goes away, but it will hold you steady until it passes.”
“No amount of anxiety makes any difference to anything that is going to happen.”
“Fear is inevitable, I have to accept that, but I cannot allow it to paralyze me.”
“It’s ok to be scared. Being scared means you’re about to do something really brave.”
“Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency.”
“Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness.”
“Worrying Is Like Praying For What You Don’t Want.”
“Anxiety’s like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it doesn’t get you very far.”
I sincerely hope that someone… somewhere through first awareness of their thinking process and a change in perception has found some strength to move forward, to become aware that there is hope, that by persevering we are able to glimpse the light at the end of the tunnel. We share the same dreams and we share the same sorrows. The same sun that shines on you today…shines on me.
May the sorrow you felt yesterday be the fuel for your strength today. That past uncertainties have become your guide for decisiveness for the future, while the loneliness you once felt, drives you to know you are one with everything today.
We salute you as you let go of perfection and strive for progress. Step by step… into the wonder of this new day. You are never alone!
With Kindness, Compassion and Love, we share this moment and move forward into this new beginning… with the knowledge that we are one…with the divine perfection of all that we are… and all that is!